i don't even know what i feel right now.

the sun goes down alone.

a little voice in my head said,

"Don't look back,

you can never look back."

i wish i could change so many things before.

fuschia nail polish and lime green post-its.
i would like to walk on clouds one day.

clear as gravity
neon lights and kryptonite
silver sounds all
around
a slow dance
under
your question marks
a cradle of mistakes where
you find your ashes
spirit drifted,
numb
to your fingertips with Speed
see the you that isn't you;
lines
running down
the
almost
sil
hou
ettes.
sssmudges of colour,
probesofcuriousity.
he last star of the night, then back to
jet black.
a wild sheep chase, to
paint
your
target.

cherry chapstick and neon pink.

hot air balloon.

i'll be out of my mind,

and you'll be out of ideas pretty soon.

sugar, we're going down.

and i wonder. how does it feel like to sublime?

to turn from something so firm, to something so vulnerable,

lighter than a feather, and gone with a breeze.

a thin sheet of grey, blanketing the metal surfaces.

as i hide behind the cover of the mist,

floating among whispers and wishes,

watching the world through the eyes of a fly on the wall.

maybe one day, i'll learn how it feels like to drift away,

and then escape from the grasp of cold hard reality.

neighbourhoods surround the soft florescent lights.

diamonds in the sky
wide-eyed wonder, and straight on,
till morning.

silver glitter reactions creating columns dark
as the white in the walls soak up all the sound.

drip, drop, and the mixtape
on the run.

a misty cloud of midnight fantasies, sleep
still in your eyes.
a dance between Reality and Spirit.
as the dreams,
collide.

ps. i would love to go to Minnesota now :)

you were my consolation prize;

a train of thought, a pause in time.

the sound of my pulse, echoing in my ears.

a hallucination? an illusion?

make believe and play pretend, not to know

that things aren't the same anymore.

looking away as you turn to talk to someone else,

a silent consolation in my heart.

you bleed just to know, you're alive?

i think i'll fall asleep to owl city tonight.

rainbow veins.

i am floating away,

lost in a silent ballad,

my darling we're both on the wing,

look down and keep on singing,

and we can go,

anywhere.

hoothoot.

"Words That Don't Exist, but Should:

AQUADEXTROUS - adj. Possessing the ability to turn the bathroom faucet on and off with your toes.
CARPERPETUATION - n. The act, when vacuuming, of running over a string or a piece of lint at least a dozen times, reaching over and picking it up, examining it, then putting it back down to give the vacuum one more chance.
DISCONFECT - v. To sterilize a piece of candy you dropped on the floor by blowing on it, assuming this will somehow "remove" all the germs.
FRUST - n. The small line of debris that refuses to be swept onto the dust pan and keep backing a person across the room until he finally decides to give up and sweep it under the rug.
PHONESIA - n. The affliction of dialing a phone number and forgetting whom you were calling just as they answer.
PUPKUS - n. The moist residue left on a window after a dog presses its nose to it.
TELECRASTINATION - n. The act of always letting the phone ring at least twice before you pick it up, even when you're only six inches away.
MUMMABOLIC CHORUS - n. When three or more people are singing along to a tune and suddenly discover they are all faking their way through the unintelligible lyrics.
NARCOLEPULACY - n. The contagious action of yawning, causing everyone in sight to also yawn.
OREOSIS - n. The practice of eating the cream center of an Oreo before eating the cookie outsides.
PAJANGLE - n. Condition of waking up with your pajamas turned 180 degrees.
PRESTOFRIGERATION - n. The peculiar habit, when searching for a snack, of constantly returning tothe refrigerator in hopes that something new will have materialized.
SARK - n. The marks left on one's ankle after wearing tube socks all day.
TANUMBUM - n. The sorry side of the Christmas tree that gets placed toward the wall."

omg. i love adam young.
i wanna live in owl cityyyy.
:))

cause in heaven, it's beautiful, baby.

and it seems, the chaos of recent, like speeding on the highway.
blur images of the things that past,
a swirl of colours and green.
speedspeedspeed.
time ticking, the sound of the metronome in your mind,
counting down the number of days, hours, times, minutes, seconds.
as your heart accelerates with the step of the mechanism,
triggers of thoughts and one-second-long nostalgia,
you brush away everything, pretending the fuel's not depleting,
your spirit's not dying.
ignorance seems to be the easy way out.
rush and dance through the events,
music blasting in your ears, so loud, but the silence in your mind, louder.
'the reason why highway signboards are so long,
was because cars travelled too fast to notice.' you think.
a jam on the brakes.
as friction brings you to a stop,
the thump of your heart, telling you you're still alive.

with distance comes regret.
as you try to salvage the situation,
trying to knit the remainder of the seams of your heart back together,
before the thread unravels itself and falls apart.
and how silent disappointment seems to hang in the air between the both of you,
him, her, them, us and everything else.
when you come to a stop, you realise how different things are.
have you ever wondered,
if gravity is the centre of everything, the one item that pulls things together, nails things to the ground, and prevents them from getting away; the seamless force around everything,
then why is it that people are still falling apart?
a tower of blocks, slowly stacked upon one another,
yet with just the sweep of the hand, collapses to the ground.
and along with time, nostalgia dances its way through your heart,
thinking of that time, that place, that event, that feeling,
throwing stones to the delves of your heart.

rewind, and try to clear things up, piece the broken shards left, lying.
deep breathe in, one last moment, new found hope, a last chance for redemption.
gear up your spirits, gravity, crystal clear,
a step on the accelerator, and-
off we go.



all i want to say is: i'll try to make things right again.